January and I have a history of not getting on.
Last January was one of the saddest, loneliest. and darkest times of my life. And this January? Well this January will be spent in Lockdown, thanks to the announcement Nicola made earlier this afternoon. While the last few days have been filled with that childlike joy that snow, ice, and this time of year often brings, it quickly disappeared when what little freedoms we did have were stripped away again in just a few words. I know, I get why she made the decision, so don’t come at me for that, but I know you also see where I am coming from.
The end of 2020 and the start of the New Year was looked on with hopeful eyes by many. They believed the minute the bells rung on 1st January, we could finally put to bed the hell the last 365 days had been and start afresh. I genuinely think many people believed all of this would go away and life would be insintaneously back to “normal”. Yet, here we are, in the same place as March and like those rats in the famous experiment done in the 1950s, we feel like we had our feet on solid ground only to have it ripped away and to be treading water again with no relief in sight. You know what got them through it though?
Hope.
Man what a word. I’ll admit it, right now I don’t feel so full of hope. I feel tired, done, bleak, sad, and any other depressing word you want to throw in there. Now don’t get me wrong, even in the midst of the whiplash of restrictions the last few months, things have actually been really really good and I have seen God work and move in some really cool ways.
I’ve been able to join a church who treat me like family and have welcomed me with open arms.
I’ve been able to be a part of a team and create an entirely new Young Adults ministry here in the Southside with the intention of creating a community of 18 to 30 (ish) year olds who just really want connection, love live music, and want to know more about God.
I have played more card games and board games and made one of the best friends in my whole life in the last 3+ months of living with Molly. Not only that, I gained a whole new family too.
I’ve made kombucha, I’ve raised a sourdough starter (s/o to Ruth and Todd), and I have been able to spend more time baking and experimenting with gluten free techniques than I could have ever imagined.
I’ve been serious about consistently reading my Bible and engaging with the girls in my Bible Read Through Group.
It would be so easy to sit here and go on and on about what’s bad or sad in the world right now, but the reality is, this is what a broken world looks like and until we reach that great future day at the end of the age when Christ returns, it’s always going to be bad and sad. And yet through it all, all the loss and fear, all the pain, all of the anxiety and depression, there is still hope. Hope in the fact that one day we will be able to gather together in pubs, and churches, and homes again. Hope that it’s not if Christ returns, but when. And the hope that I have an eternity in Him.
So January, here we are. Let’s put all of the old resentment aside and step foreward into this next year with hope, no matter what the days may throw at us.
Resting in hope,
Lexi
lexigoesadventuring 